Letter to my Dad

Dad,

I cannot believe that you have been gone for a whole year. It just does not even feel possible or even reality still. I thought surely by now it would... I miss you so much.

There are so many things I wish I could tell you. I wish I could tell you about all the incredible things the Lord has done because of your death. It would take me forever to list them all, but someday I hope to be able to tell you! I wish I could tell you how the Lord has cared for Mom over the past year. We joke about her "extra protection", but realize that it's for real and must be from the Lord. She always seems to find her way, ends up being the only one with electricity, and so on. We know it isn't just coincidence! I wish I could tell you that JR and Ashlee are married and have bought their first house. JR is managing Cross Timbers Marina and has grown into such a great man. You would be so proud of him. I wish I could tell you about all the funny things Jayden does. You would have so much fun with him and get such a kick out of all his goofy little antics. I wish I could tell you about how tall JC is and how his coach is going to have scouts come watch him play basketball. You would be so proud of him too. Most of all, I wish I could tell you about my sweet little Sophie. She is so tiny and sweet. I just can't believe that she will never know you. Sure we will tell her all about you, but she will never get to have the joy and pleasure of having you as her Pa. That is definitely the hardest thing for me to deal with right now. You never got the opportunity to be the wonderful grandpa we knew you could have been. It makes me so sad to know that they will not have the joy of having you around.

Even though this has been the hardest and worst year of my life, I can honestly say that the Lord has been faithful in his promise that He will not allow anything in our life that would be more than we can handle. His grace has been sufficient for us and carried us through. Inspite of all the sorrow He has brought joy into our lives, which I just didn't think possible. I don't understand how He works. I don't understand how He can be so compassionate and caring and yet allow us to feel such pain and sorrow. I trust Him and know that it is only love that He has for us, but I just don't understand His ways. I wish that I could talk to you because I know that you now understand all these things. That is such a neat thought to me. I wish I knew just what you were experiencing! I can't wait to be there too!

I love you.
Brooke